I always wanted my business to be a vehicle for freedom in my life. I love the work I do but I also want to fall in love, swim in the sea, make a home, make new friends, feel part of a community, move my body, take my nephew on a steam train, catch up with old friends, visit new places, learn new things, spend quality time with my Mum and Dad...
I want to get to the end of my life and feel like, "wow, I really lived it", you know?
All of this to say, despite the year long pause in these emails, I'm still here, working away behind the scenes and making it my business to get busy living too. Some Summer living snapshots below...
One sunny Monday in July, I skived school and went on a mini adventure with a friend. We met somewhere on the Devon and Somerset boarder. We walked, talked, cycled around country lanes, swam in lakes and finished with a late lunch in the pub before driving home our separate ways, stocked up on friendship and mischief.
I went on a date. It was a Tuesday evening. We swam in the sea, watched the sun set and both agreed there was no connection there. I felt sad, not about him, but about my dream of falling in love that suddenly felt so far away from me as I drove home in the dark.
The next day I woke up and drove to Fowey. I sat in coffee shops, watched the world go by, the boats bob up and down and felt something settle inside of me. A change of scene always works wonders, don't you think? And the flame of hope still flickers, which is important when it comes to the things we dream about.
I don't recall any Thursday diary entries... I did have a hygienist appointment one Thursday which was extremely unpleasant, so I flossed my teeth every day for two weeks and then stopped. Forgot about it I think. I'm sure James Clear has something to say about that. ;)
I've been volunteering at Coombe Farm Studios. Every Friday afternoon I paint walls, mop floors, make beds, pack down easels, stir pottery glazes, pick flowers, chop food, lay the table, wash up, drink tea and do all sorts of things that don't require the internet or a computer screen. It's so simple and so joyful. And ending each week with the same friendly faces feels like community to me.
I ended the summer with a week in Portugal with my Mum and Dad My Mum loves playing golf but my Dad hasn't been well enough or able to play with her in recent years. They've spent a considerable chunk of their lives doing stuff for me, probably a lot of it they didn't really want to do - so accompanying Mum on the golf course one afternoon when I'd rather be sunning myself by the pool, and driving to the supermarket each morning to get my Dad a paper when I'd rather be drinking coffee and daydreaming - is really the least I can do, I thought. And it dawned on me that this is quality time and suddenly in that moment it felt like there really was nowhere else I'd rather be. Plus, driving a golf buggy is pretty good fun too!
“We are very good at preparing to live, but not very good at living. We know how to sacrifice ten years for a diploma, and we are willing to work very hard to get a job, a car, a house, and so on. But we have difficulty remembering that we are alive in the present moment, the only moment there is for us to be alive.
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